Just buy a monkey. No two are alike, you'll be cooler than all your friends, and someday when I'm a famous monkey artist, you can sell it for way more on Ebay or something.
Just buy one. You'll get to have your own monkey.
Adopt a monkey to support SockTreatment, and your contribution will also be supporting a good cause, as a portion of the proceeds goes to me.
Your Monkey: $26.77 (plus $6.95 shipping anywhere in USA/Canada) Most monkeys are made of the original Rockford Red Heeled Socks, and come standard size, like 21 or 22" long. OR you can ask for a specific color or tie-dye.